Friday, March 2, 2012


There's not a day that goes by that Jack isn't in our hearts and prayers. On Nov 21, 2011 Baby Jack became a big brother.
Jacob James entered this world with a smile on his face, we wish you were here to see it.

WE hope this year to have the new playground equipment installed in 2 of the neighboring town parks, in memory of Baby Jack.

Friday, July 29, 2011


On July 19th, we had a 7am 21 wk ultrasound in Omaha. Our first u/s looked good, but that was at 12 wks,so while we had positive thoughts, there was still that chance of problems. On the drive down at 6am, "Blessings" by Laura Story came on the radio. We both like the song, and was praying for a healthy u/s.

Everything looked good on the u/s, everything appears to be forming normal, and we're praying for a healthy baby. On the drive home, "Blessings" was on xm radio. Closer to home, heard it again on the FM dial 104.9. Is it a godwink? Later that day while farming, "Blessings" again was on. Even if it's coincidense, we felt there was a 'presence" around us.

We're so Excited for our "Blessing" come November.

Friday, May 27, 2011

A break in the clouds

On the was home from our first ultrasound in Omaha, "love has come" by Mark Schultz came on the radio, and the first verse kinda sums it up.

Well, I know this life is filled with sorrow
And there are days when the pain just lasts and lasts
But I know there will come a day
When all our tears are washed away with a break in the clouds
His glory coming down and in that moment

As we were anticipating this day for weeks, we had prepared ourself for the worst. There was a chance that this baby could have anencephaly. As we knew the risk was there, deep down, we didn't know if we could handle it, we just kept praying and praying for a healthy baby.

At 10:40AM Friday, May 27th, we got to see, (as far as the Dr. could tell) a healthy, and perfect little baby. Granted this ultrasound was done at 14 weeks, a little earlier than most, and another is scheduled for 20 wks. We saw a complete skull, and a good forming brain. So far everything appears good and normal.

As excited we are, something happens once you lose a child, that forever changes how you view things. Weather it's friends who have been hoping to grow thir family, or another diagnosis of anencephaly. Everytime we hear or read their story, a piece of our heart goes out to them. We wish we could make the sorrow go away, but we can't.

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Mixed Emotions

Through our journey with Baby Jack, we've been following the blogs of other families that have had babies with anencephaly. It appears that quite a few try for another child soon afterwards. With the success of many couples, some just weeks after, we were optimistic that we would have the same luck. Weeks went by, then months with no success. Then... maybe...maybe... it appears that were pregnant. We were so excited, but hesitant to tell anyone till we knew we felt it was safe to without getting allot of hopes up for nothing. Then after about 8wks, something wasn't right, in the middle of the night Sarah awoke with pain, and minutes later, we knew it had aborted. Needless to say, we were dissappointed.

Every night when the kids go to bed and we say our prayers, we pray for all the people we know who are trying to start or expand their family. We wish their was a way to make the prayers come true.

"Ask and you shall receive, seek and you shall find, knock and the door shall be opened unto you." Luke 11:9

"Again I say to you, that if two of you agree on earth about anything that they may ask, it shall be done for them by My Father who is in heaven." Matthew 18:19

"And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive." Matthew 21:22

A few months go by, and towards the end of March, after several tests, Success!! Nov 27th 2011 is the expectd due date. As excited as we are, we stil hope and pray everyday that others prayes will be answered.
We have a 4D ultrasound scheduled for the end of May, and hopefully we'll get to see a healthy, perfect little baby.

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

It's been a while

I finally decided to sit down and write more about our journey with Baby Jack. There's no doubt that this has been a very hard journey and being able to share our thoughts here, has helped. Thoughts come and go, on how and why this happened. One of things that has happened because of Baby Jack is how it has changed our life spiritually. We've always been a church going, christian family, were both brought up that way and teach our childen the same. But when we fould out Baby Jacks diagnosis, it hurt.

For it is commendable if someone bears up under the pain of unjust suffering because they are conscious of God
1Peter 2:19

The eyes of the LORD are on the righteous,
and his ears are attentive to their cry
Psalm 34:15

Throughout our journey with Baby Jack, we've learn to deal with emotions that were sometime almost to much.

The righteous cry out, and the LORD hears them;
he delivers them from all their troubles.
The LORD is close to the brokenhearted
and saves those who are crushed in spirit.
The righteous person may have many troubles,
but the LORD delivers him from them all;
he protects all his bones,
not one of them will be broken.
Psalm 34:17-20

After the loss of Baby Jack, I feel we've been made stronger to help those find the strength and direction they need from the Lord. Earlier this fall, I left the combine early on afternoon to take Sarah to a Mercy Me concert in Sioux CIty. What an event. To feel his power at the show was something.

It appears that it's harder to get the younger generation to trust in what the Lord has to offer. Moat go to church and think they're ok, but are they really?
There's this old saying,

"Just going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in your garage makes you a car."
— G.K. Chesterton

My point being, all this probably wouldn't have came about if it's wasn't for Baby Jack. What an impact he has made.

Thursday, November 18, 2010

Forever Mine

-- Forever Mine--- Those are the words that Jesus said when Baby Jack came to him. They are also the last words of Chris Tomlin's song "Amazing Grace" As he is the Lord's now, He'll remain in our hearts Forever.

This fall while in the combine, everything runs through a guys mind. This fall I was hoping to have a new co-pilot with me, this year the buddy seat was empty. Almost everyday I'd hear a song, or something on the radio, and I'd get thoughts to write about on the blog. Now hopefully the next few weeks I can get them on paper.

We got Baby Jacks headstone delivered late this summer.
Here's Jonathan and Ally by it.

We Also got our "Jack" (Bradford Pear) tree planted this Fall. It was given to us by some of our wonderful friends and neighbors. Thank you.

As we look back a year ago, we were keeping the Exciting news of a new baby a secret, then, having told that there was a fatal birth defect. What an emotional roller coaster. We've both lost loved ones, old and young, but this one hits the hardest, really hard at times. As we wanted another baby, and now he's gone, and patience is one thing I wasn't born with. Hopefully someday again..

We're thankful that we were able to concieve him, as others (some relatives and some friends) are waiting for their miracle to happen. How I wish we could grant them their wish, hopefully in time their wish will come true.